Bitter Sweet Times!

Well today marks the two month birthday of my sweet baby boy. Mother hood is more amazing than I could have ever thought of. My days are filled with his smiles along with wearing my PJ's all day with spit up on them, never having anytime to eat, and getting to take a shower these days is like winning the lotto. But i wouldn't change any of it. It is very true with what they say about having a little boy... you fall in love with them.
Now onto a more serious subject... going back to work. This subject has had my anxiety growing more rapidly everyday. My heart is breaking because I don't want to leave my little man. If work will allow me, to go part time that would be better but I just don't like being away from him. He is now on a routine and I know it will be thrown off when he is with his sitter. I can already tell that the first day back is going to be a horrible day for me. I am having a hard time talking about it, I just start tearing up. Gable has asked me how I am feeling about it, and I just change the subject. I feel like I would rather stay in denial then discuss leaving Caleb and going back to work. I don't believe we have anyway around this, and I just need to put my big girl pants on.
But if you ladies could pray for me! Pray that it will be easier and to just get over it.